PHOTOS: CHRISTOPHER SCALZI / DISTILLED STUDIO
Stacy London — puttin’ the rock in CEO
Make it swing, Stacy!
Demonstrating how to claim that space, ladies. Yes. We belong here.
GLORIOUS PROFESSION: TV star turned CEO
GLORIOUS PERSONA: Straight shooter, transformer, hard worker
GLORIOUS QUALITIES: Fashion forward, Transparent, Change Agent
GLORIOUS PHILOSOPHY:
“Accept aging. That’s the grace.”
Separated at birth?? At first I didn’t think I'd have much in common with Stacy London. She was the star of What Not to Wear and I ... well, most of the folks on Perry Street know me. And yes, I have style … but not STACY-level-build-a-career-on-it style.
But what we share is profound: We’re fierce. We’re funny. And we're both getting comfortable — getting REAL — about aging. The good news. The bad news. No sugar-coating. No bullshit. And no shame. Wrapping our arms around the next chapter. Stacy walked away from TV to become CEO of State of Menopause — a company focused on products to help women through (what used to be called) THE CHANGE. And our girl knows her shit — on the road 24-7 talkin the talk, walkin the walk. Check out my twinsie soul sister and Glorious Broad, Stacy London.
YOU ARE GLORIOUSLY TRANSPARENT ABOUT AGING. WHY IS THAT?
Because I spent too long trying to be what I thought others wanted me to be — and felt resentful. I had to learn to own my insecurities and not see them as flaws — but facets of being human. The more truth you can tell, the safer others feel to share their truth too. This has been my experience.
DID YOU DREAM AT 16 THAT YOU’D BE THE GLORIOUS BROAD THAT YOU ARE TODAY?
At 16, I was worried about my hair, not my future.
From TV Star to … ?
YOUR CAREER SHIFT — FROM TV HOST TO CEO AT 52, I AM WONDERING ABOUT THAT PIVOT.
WAS THERE SHAME IN NOT SELLING YOUR TV IDEA AFTER BEING A STAR — OR SLOW RECOGNITION FOR YOUR NEED TO CHANGE?
I want to say both.
DO TELL: WHAT WAS THE SHOW ABOUT?
I pitched this in 2018. About multigeneration mentorship, like a 25-year-old can teach a 45-year-old how to be more digitally savvy. But a 45-year-old might teach a 25-year-old about broken hearts. Everybody was like, nobody's going to watch it.
OUCH.
Yeah. I stopped doing full time TV in 2016. And that had to do with my spine surgery and recovery. I kept thinking — I'm gonna get back into the business. But something was always cutting me off at the knees.
DO YOU THINK YOUR TV IDEAS WERE REJECTED BECAUSE OF:
a. SEXISM
b. AGEISM
c. ALL OF THE ABOVE
Definitely C.
WHAT ABOUT THE PRESSURE TO LOOK 32 FOREVER? THAT MUST HAVE BEEN A BITCH.
I was 48. My body was changing. My skin, my psyche. I remember thinking: I will never look like I used to — and I didn’t like that.
A UNIVERSAL STRUGGLE, BUT MOST OF US DON'T HAVE TO PLAY THAT OUT ON TV... WHAT WAS GOING ON FOR YOU EMOTIONALLY WITH THIS REJECTION …
My dad died in November of 2018. Completely devastating. The grief was so real, the brain fog and the deep sadness — the anxiety and depression. I was completely resigned that I would never be ok again. A numbness set in.
And I didn't know how to connect the dots. I thought menopause was optional, or it happened to other people.
Just When You Thought You Were Safe
OH GIRL: I WAS SO THERE
I attributed every single issue I had, that is clearly menopause, either to physical trauma from surgery or to emotional trauma from losing my father.
I RELATE. I LOST MY SISTER AT 50. I WAS SUDDENLY SAD, DEPRESSED, OUT OF CONTROL, SICK OF MY VERY SUCCESSFUL JOB, AND NOT HAVING FUN REINVENTING MYSELF. IT TOOK A FRIEND OF MINE, WHICH IS WACKY, TO SAY YOU'RE IN MENOPAUSE GIRL.
I'm sorry. But every time I meet somebody who speaks the same language — it's an aha moment. The more we talk about it we are able to really help one another through it.
SO WHAT PUSHED YOU TO ACT?
COVID. The first time in in my life I took a true pause.
YES. THE SILVER LINING OF THE PANDEMIC.
It gave me clarity. This idea that there is no other person for me to be other than on television? I've done this for 15 years — before that I was a magazine editor. What if I don't want to make people over anymore?
People were telling me transformation shows aren't in right now. It's only competition shows. I was like: What do I do in the meantime? I am not a self-starter — or I thought i wasn't a self-starter.
YOU GOT THAT WRONG
Well, I knew I didn’t want to be an influencer — I don't have anything to say that people aren't already saying. I've said it.
YOU HAVE.
And I realized — menopause has been so hard for me. Why am I not talking about this existential crisis I was stewing in and miserable over …
FROM THE PERSONAL COMES THE UNIVERSAL … THAT’S YOUR QUOTE
Yes it is. (laughs) The kernel of all of my work is helping people identify what gives them self-esteem.
A CEO is Born...
WHERE DOES BEING THE CEO OF YOUR OWN MENOPAUSE COMPANY COME IN?
I started beta testing State of Menopause — and I was very noisy. (laughs) They were making a middle- aged skincare product — but I saw something bigger.
The company decided to sell their brands — and I bought them and made it the company.
SO ARE YOU AIMING TO BE ONE OF THOSE MULTIGENERATIONAL JOINTS WITH FLEXIBLE WORK SPACE AND A FLAT ORG STRUCTURE TO ATTRACT THE ZOOMERS?
I am committed to walk the walk. We're affordable because of socio-economic disparity, we're making products good for all ethnicities, we use gender neutral language. What we say matters. And I do see younger CEOs working this way.
ALEX FINE, FOUNDER OF DAME PRODUCTS IS SUCH AN EXAMPLE OF THIS. SO REFRESHING – AND HOPEFUL. AND A GB BY THE BY WHO’S VERY VERY FUNNY …
SO, IN THE END, YOU USED THAT OLD ADAGE: “WRITE WHAT YOU KNOW”
Yes. It was there right under my nose.
“I am committed to walk the walk. We’re making products good for all ethnicities. We use gender neutral language. What we say matters.”
WAS THIS THE BIGGEST RISK OF YOUR LIFE?
By far.
I THINK IT'S INTERESTING WHEN PEOPLE THINK REINVENTION IS EASY — BANKER TO BAKER CRAP. IT'S NOT AT ALL. LOOK WHAT YOU WENT THROUGH … THE REJECTION FROM MEDIA, WHO AM I. IT’S A BITCH.
Oh for sure. And, now, I'm talking to investors.
OH I HAVE HEARD HOW SEXIST THAT CAN BE …
Oh Yes. And they're like — who's going to run your company?
Being put back in a box — yet again. I’m not gonna let that happen.
OH NO YOU WON’T. (laughs)
WELL, MENOPAUSE IS IN THE AIR. IT FEELS LIKE MAYBE IT IS OUR GENERATION WHO HAVE MADE THIS SHIFT TO TALK.
Yes. And then, Suzanne Somners kind of falls in the middle. God bless her. She really did try to have this conversation. She was way early. I think I might be a little too early for it. But I don't care. We start where we are.
GB IS ALL ABOUT OWNING AGE, BEING REAL.
Yes. No sugar-coating age. We have this terrible association — being past your expiration date.
We’re taught to value youth and wealth. Being thin, right?
But we're gonna be older a lot longer than were gonna be younger.
I HAVE SUCH A PROBLEM WITH “AGING GRACEFULLY” — I WANNA ROAR THANKYOUVERYMUCH.
When we say “aging gracefully” — we put a value judgement on something inevitable.
Accept aging. That’s the grace.
LET’S MOVE THAT NEEDLE BABY
“I never looked at my life and said: Okay, now I’m going to date women. I simply fell in love with this person. This woman.”
DID YOU LEARN ANYTHING ABOUT YOUR SEXUALITY, YOUR BODY, YOUR FUTURE, FROM YOUR PARENTS?
I grew up with baby boomers. We kept everything private. And we didn't realize how harmful keeping secrets could be. And now we've got younger generations who are deconstructing race, gender... It's a whole new world.
AND THIS YOUNGER GENERATION TALKING ABOUT THEIR PERIODS, THEIR BODIES ... IN A WAY WE NEVER DID …
Infertility. Post partum …
Part of the reason I wanted to talk about my personal experience with aging, with menopause with so much transparency — I feel younger generations gave me permission to do it
SPEAKING OF SEXUALITY … HOW WAS YOURS DURING MENOPAUSE? MINE DIED.
My female gynecologist said: Use it or lose it. Then I guess I lost it. Because I had no sex drive whatsoever. I loved sex. Then I had this kind of reckoning when I fell in love with a woman.
The Great Awakening
AND WHAT IS THAT?
I'm learning more and more about this. It is a stage of life where you know women are willing to take more chances. And I did that …
SO. WHAT HAPPENED? I HAVE SEEN YOU TWO TOGETHER AND IT IS …
I simply fell in love with this person. This woman …
WAS THAT A SURPRISE TO YOU? …
I wouldn't say I was perfectly happy being straight because I dated such shitty guys. But, aside from that, I never looked at it and said: Okay, now I'm going to date women.
I NOTED YOU TOOK A YEAR TO ANNOUNCE YOU AND CAT, YOUR GIRLFRIEND, ON SOCIAL MEDIA
Well, I wasn’t sure at first if it was just a fling. Was I just curious — what was it…? But my being as a sexual person did change. And there is a lot more intimacy in the way that I experience sex now. As opposed to this insane, fleeting passion — there’s still passion and desire there. But It's so much more intricate and so much more interesting to me.
INTERESTING TO YOU — DO YOU MEAN — LESS PERFORMANCE?
Less performative. Now I have this true mutual love and understanding that allows for more intricacy. And that's something that I never expected. I'm not saying like — you have to go date women to feel that. But I do feel it’s a wonderful time of life to be able to experiment with how sex changes for you. It is not static. Sex changes, but it doesn't have to disappear.
MY PROBLEM WITH INVISIBLE: WE CHOOSE TO BE INVISIBLE. AND THAT INCLUDES A ROLLICKING SEX LIFE…
Yes! And Cat makes me feel safe. And loved.
Stacy with her partner, Cat Yezbak … purrrrrr
IF I WERE TO ASK YOU FOR ONE MESSAGE TO YOUNGER WOMEN, WHAT WOULD IT BE?
Surround yourself with the people who will lift you up on this roller coaster of a ride; those who cheer you on and watch your back. Everyone else is just passing through.
I AGREE WITH YOU THAT DURING THE GLOBAL “PAUSE”, WE HAD AN OPPORTUNITY TO REFLECT — I WONDER IF THE FASHION INDUSTRY AND THE BEAUTY INDUSTRY — WILL THEY EVOLVE AFTER COVID? WHAT’S YOUR TAKE?
I truly hope that it will be less about beauty in terms of vanity, and more about beauty in terms of wellness. I'm sure there will be those people who can't wait to put high heels back on and dress to the nines and whatever.
I WAS GOING TO ASK YOU IF YOU'RE WEARING STILETTOS.
No.
ITS OVER?
I am wearing a pair of boots actually. I want people to come back and celebrate fashion. But I want fashion to be deliberate!
Our Next Change Agent is... High Fashion? Yep.
I'm hoping that style starts to take precedence over fashion. Fashion is an industry built on insecurity and style is about personal agency, right?
Fashion can make a real social change.
HMMMMM. LIKE WHAT?
Look at Pier Piciolli from Valentino. He’s so smart.
WELL, I LOVE HIS CASTING … WHAT ELSE?
He was wearing a sweatshirt on Instagram that said V, you know, the Valentino V. But underneath it, it said vaccinated, and it was not made by him. It was made by this a company in LA called Cloney — who does all sorts of funny things.
NO CEASE AND DESIST ORDER?
No. Pierre not only bought the rest of the sweatshirts that Cloney had. He gave one to Lady Gaga and other A+ celebs. What he said to Cloney was, look, I am going to make these sweatshirts for you. Under Valentino's label. You donate the idea. I will put up the money for them. And all of the proceeds will go to getting people vaccinated in countries where the vaccine isn't possible.
WHA!? EVERYBODY WINDS UP WINNING?
Yes! So this is what fashion can do. Just think of what is possible with the kind of power that these brands have — that kind of money.
Did you see the special Bo Burnham did — INSIDE? Oooooo. That comedian called out my earnestness. And I can be earnest. But Pier acted!
“Live — and dress — into who you are right now. Instead of trying to be who you were. ”
SO SPEAKING POLITICALLY CORRECT — HOW DO YOU FEEL WHEN YOU SEE SOME OF THE OLDER SEASONS OF WHAT NOT TO WEAR — DO THEY MAKE YOU CRINGE?
Yeah. I cringe at some of them. I mean — two white people telling a woman of color what she can and cannot wear? Or telling a woman what she cannot wear after you’re 35? But that was then. And this is now.
WELL, I’VE GOT TO ASK YOU SOME FASHION QUESTIONS WOMAN
Go!
DO YOU HAVE ANY RULES FOR OLDER VERSUS YOUNGER IN TERMS OF FASHION NOW?
No. And I'll tell you why. At What Not to Wear — we were really trying to make people over so that they looked palatable to others, right? And now I say, live into who you are right now. Instead of trying to be who you were. I really want to encourage people to trust their own instinct.
TAKES KNOWING YOURSELF. IN THIS MOMENT. AND A LOT OF PEOPLE DO DRESS FROM THEIR PAST – KIND OF RECREATING WHAT THEY THINK WAS THEIR “PEAK”. HEY! I CATCH MYSELF DOING THAT …
During COVID, I got rid of a ton of clothes. I don't even know what I like anymore. Even I’m confused. I was holding on to things that I looked good in years ago on What Not to Wear. That is the difference between understanding where you are and nostalgia. I love women whose style evolves and has consistency. Sharon Stone is a perfect example. That woman has aged in a way that I – I am like MWAH
GLORIOUS BROAD!
She's not denying her age. She’s not flaunting it. She just is who she is — completely — and that is exactly the way that emboldens and empowers you. And if you wanted to define your waistline, or wear a pointy toe shoe, good on you.
IS IT HARD TO TURN OFF THAT FASHION ADVICE IN YOUR PERSONAL LIFE — WITH YOUR PARTNER? She asks me and I always have an opinion. I mean, you know, that's part of my DNA (laughs)
AND HOW ABOUT WHEN YOU’RE OUT IN PUBLIC?
Sometimes I do have to walk around with blinders on. (laughs)
Do you know Advanced Style? I love them. I’m dressed very '90s today — black shirt, wide leg khakis with a pair of boots — minimalist — and I feel awesome. But if I wanted to wear a ball gown and a fascinator — who the hell is goin to tell me that it’s inappropriate for my age?
NOBODY WOMAN!
Mentor Corner
WHO WOULD YOU SAY IS YOUR BIGGEST MENTOR IN LIFE?
Oh that’s hard. I’ve had many. But here are a few:
My dad. And my mom. In very different ways.
Katie Couric. She so helped me in the business.
Oprah being another one.
THE OPRAH?
Oprah opened doors for me. So much came after I was on Oprah a few times.
Andre Leon Talley when I was a fashion editor.
And Whoopi Goldberg. Whoopi taught me what it means to stand up for yourself.
“Another mentor? Whoopi Goldberg. She taught me what it means to stand up for yourself.”
ANOTHER GLORIOUS ONE …
HAS YOUR CORE STAYED THE SAME … FROM THE YOUNG WOMAN THAT YOU WERE TO WHO YOU ARE NOW?
Not at all. I truly used to be a real bully and a bitch. Especially when I was young. I had deep insecurity and fear. Yeah, and it has taken me a long time to forgive myself for that, and to grow from it and be a different kind of person. Everything is always evolving.
WHAT WOULD YOU DO OVER AGAIN IF YOU COULD?
I’d save more money and invest in women/queer/BIPOC companies.
DO YOU HAVE A MANTRA IN LIFE?
Why not me?
DO YOU CONSIDER YOURSELF A FEMINIST?
I had a mom who burned her bra, right? This is the woman who paved the way for me. So there is no way that I could look at my life and say that I wasn’t going to grow to be anything else.
YOU REALLY ARE A GLORIOUS BROAD. WHAT DOES GLORIOUS MEAN TO YOU?
Glorious is a root word for joy.
And I love the name Glorious Broads.
WELL – WHAT ABOUT THE WORD BROADS?
Now that is what I thought you were going to ask. That’s my type of woman.
Want some pausin' for the menopausin'? Stacy's company, The State of Menopause has got you. Want some real Stacy: IG @stacylondonreal