Glorious Broad #20: Kathleen Turner

Loved her for forever? Us too.

Loved her for forever? Us too.

I have a thing for Kathleen Turner. I own that. But when I saw her as the man-eating Martha in “Whose Afraid of Virgina Wolf” on Broadway in 2005 — I was officially obsessed. Knowing her past STEAMY status — knowing the tough in-between phase — watchin’ her knock our socks off on the stage so many decades later — erasing any other Martha before her — even Ben Brantley apologized to her in print for his earlier belittling expectations. Yeah — that good.

A few months ago, I was listening to one of my bestie podcasts called “She’s a Talker” — Neil Goldberg chatting hilariously with Kathleen. She was game, smart and FUNNY.  I thought: Why not go to the top. Our policy has been no celebrities. But Kathleen — she is beyond celebrity into just damn Glorious Broad Kingdom.

A little education for you young-uns: Think legend. She is the steamy, sultry voice of Jessica Rabbit to some, THE sex bomb sultry murderer in “Body Heat,” scary “Serial Mom”, psycho wife in “War of the Roses” … there are so many. Countless awards and nominations. And now she is coming back to Season 3 with Michael Douglas in “The Kominsky Method” playing — what else — a baaaaaaaad broad: “It will always be much more fun to play the bad girl.” Yes, we see Kathleen.

Blunt, steely, witty and a sheer life force, we introduce Glorious Broad Kathleen Turner. Grab a martini for this one.

GLORIOUS PROFESSION: Actor. Period.

GLORIOUS PERSONA: Not Taking Any Shit

GLORIOUS QUALITIES: Determined, Hilarious, Triumphant, Sexy and THAT VOICE

GLORIOUS PHILOSOPHY:

It will always be much more fun to play the bad girl

YOU ARE SOME KINDA GLORIOUS BROAD … AND HERE YOU ARE!
Well, what brought me in was the name “Glorious Broads.” Me and my poker buddies — some of whom I have known for over 30 years — have been calling each other Broads for forever. Me and my theatre buddies — my family — we all call each other Broads. And the Glorious is a great touch by the by …

HEARING YOU ON THE “SHE’S A TALKER” PODCAST SLAYED ME. YOU ARE FUNNY!
I am funny! I favor the twisted funny. From John Water’s “Serial Mom” to — what’s comin’ up again… a return to “War of the Roses” — kind of — and that was really twisted …

YOU MEAN “THE KOMINSKY METHOD.” YOUR ONE EPISODE APPEARANCE ON SEASON 2 WAS PERFECT: WHEN YOU GOT THE CALL FROM “ASSHOLE” EX HUSBAND … HAHAHA … I RELATED!
Boy did we have fun. That Michael Douglas! He doesn’t change … and let’s just say – the war between that couple continues. I know him so well. I asked: “Would you marry me again?” (ummm, for those who don’t know the movie — they kill each other in “War”) He looked at me dumbfounded — I had to assure him “I’m just fucking with you”…

DID YOU KNOW AT 16 THAT YOU WOULD BECOME THE GLORIOUS BROAD THAT YOU ARE TODAY?
I have to say, I envisioned the life I lead. Except for the Rheumatoid Arthritis part and some, ahem, challenges in-between — but I saw myself on stage. I saw myself as a star. And, to be specific, the twenty-year-old me saw herself on stage — playing Martha from “Whose Afraid of Virgina Wolf” when I turned 50. And I was 50 when I landed that role. So, yeah, I did.

WHAT GAVE YOU THE CHUTZPAH TO HAVE THIS VISION — AND MAKE IT A REALITY?
I didn’t have a “normal” childhood. Dad was in foreign service so we traveled and lived everywhere, learned languages. Years in Cuba, Venezuela, high school in London. And then I blasted out of Southwest Missouri State after graduation to go after my dream.

I have confidence in my work. But personal? Not so much.

I SAW YOU AS THE LIFE-FORCE MARTHA IN “WHOSE AFRAID OF VIRGINIA WOLF” WITH MY 23 YEAR-OLD NEPHEW. YOU TOOK MY BREATH AWAY. AND MY GOB-SMACKED NEPHEW: ALL HE COULD SAY WAS, "MARTHA’S SO SEXY!"
(Laughs) Even at 20, I saw a humor in that role — something I haven’t seen in any of the productions. I knew I could do that. Ambitious, intelligent, brawling Martha saw no future for herself except as a professor’s wife hosting University cocktail parties — aaahhhh —that’s the RAGE. So — empathy and admiration and all in your face sexuality — and the booze. So much booze.

SO DO YOU HAVE THAT CONFIDENCE IN EVERYTHING?
When it comes to the work, yes. Even at 20. Personal? Not so much.

But on stage? I just light up. That is where I get my life force — and at any age.

SO MANY OF YOUR ROLES ARE ABOUT SEX, AGE, AND POWER … FROM “BODY HEAT” TO … WELL, YOU’RE STILL DOIN’ IT!
Sex and age is so interesting. When I took on Mattie in “Body Heat,” the director, Larry Kasdon, asked me my age. 25 about to be 26. He nearly passed out. "You need to be hittin’ 30 — we need the age!" He was sure that someone so young wouldn't have that kind of sexual confidence.

You know how it is when you know you are really sexy? When I feel great about myself and walk into a room — if a man doesn’t look at me, he’s either dead or gay.

If you feel sexy, you are.

And now, baby, I still project sexuality and attractiveness with the toss of my head or the confidence in my eyes. And, of course, my voice. I love that.

Once, being seen as a sex icon was like a millstone. Now, it’s the icing on the cake, to be savored down to the last lick
— "Send Yourself Roses" by Kathleen Turner

LET’S TALK ABOUT THAT VOICE
What does it matter what you look like if people cringe when you open your mouth? Voice is power. My voice has taken on a persona of its own. I was not born to be an ingenue.

WHAT WAS IT LIKE TO LEAVE BEHIND THE SEX BOMB — AND HOLLYWOOD — AND MAKE THE TRANSITION THROUGH ILLNESS.
You know, when all that was happening, every single day was tough. Each day. I didn’t have the strength at that time to do anything — I was too busy trying to hold a fucking pen — walk across the room — to care about the shit people were saying. And they were sayin’ it…

BUT HOW’D YOU WORK THROUGH THAT PAIN — AND THEN READ THE CRAP PEOPLE WERE SAYING?
Who would I be if I didn’t work? Yes, I was a mother. I had a family. But I had to work. It is who I am. And now, I’m loving teaching. And this last season, through all this COVID shit, and working on zoom, not being able to use our whole bodies — I still love it. But boy have I missed being in a room.  The name is “Practical Acting.” I am so against the method. I can’t tell you. Shut up and do it! (laughing)

Reunited and it feels so good — Kathleen and Michael together again

Reunited and it feels so good — Kathleen and Michael together again

DO YOU FEEL YOU WERE ROBBED OF YOUR MID-LIFE CAREER WITH HOLLYWOOD BIGWIGS DECIDING YOU WERE NO LONGER A LEADING LADY — AND ENDURING YOUR ILLNESS?
It was tough. It was. But what could I do. I had always planned to go back to Broadway — but all this escalated that return.

Understand, Rheumatoid Arthritis hit me in my late 30s, and the hardest part was so much of my confidence was based on my physicality. But I fuckin’ got my confidence back.

When I returned in “The Graduate” and my famous 20 second nude scene that got so much attention — I had to get it up for that scene  — let me tell you. Full houses. Lousy reviews. No nominations. But then Martha in Virginia Wolf —  and those reviews … each night was magic. Ben Brantley apologized in print for his earlier expectations. Double magic.

AND WHAT DO YOU SAY WHEN PEOPLE COMMENT ON YOUR LOOKS …
When someone says to me — and they do — you don’t look like you did 30 years ago. I always like to say: NEITHER DO YOU. (laughs) — I mean, there are people out there who can look exactly like they do 30 years ago ‚ but I would rather have a life thankyouverymuch.

So it’s a real fuck you going on for me — FUCK YOU.

THEATER VERSUS MOVIES?
Theater. No comparison.

WHY NEW YORK?
I am a New Yorker. I knew immediately. Had I stayed in LA, I’d be really wealthy. But what do I want now? Another house? Why? I don’t need that. Its all about the next role …

When someone says to me — and they do — you don’t look like you did 30 years ago. I always like to say: Neither do you

WHO DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
I don’t know that I want to BE her but oh do I admire Maggie Smith.. I’ve been in the business for 44 years – and Maggie has 20 years ahead of me. There is never a sell-by-date. No No No.

DREAM ROLE?
I’ve had Lear on my mind for a while. I cannot wait to get back on stage … and Amanda, the mother, from “The Glass Menagerie” — I’m willing to do it in Australia. I saw Cherry Jones do it here— and I could never compare to that. But I would do it somewhere far far far away (laughs)

GIVE ME YOUR ONE LINE PHILOSOPHY ON THE FOLLOWING:
SEX
It’s just not interesting to me anymore. Point is. I don’t care.

AGE
I face a battle each day. But. Appreciation. Yes. Appreciation.

COVID
A tough year. 
But I’ve been here with my butch black cat. She understands me.

WHAT DOES GLORIOUS MEAN TO YOU?
Rosalind Russell in “MAME.” She doesn’t have to say FUCK YOU — she is FUCK YOU.

WHAT DOES SUCCESS MEAN TO YOU NOW?
When my poker broads come over — and I can buy caviar for the whole crew. We just had our first game since this whole thing started.

That to me is success!